SPANK CHEEKS

Thursday, June 15, 2006

NEWS YOU DON'T REALLY CARE ABOUT


Let me first reiterate how much I fucking hate Comcast. I have a repairman coming between the convenient hours of "8 a.m. to 8 p.m." today, and I've decided the best way to ensure customer satisfaction is to hide behind the door, spray him in the face with mace, and kick him in the balls once he's safely inside. And then say, "Fix my fucking internet, you incompetent fucktard!" We'll see how it goes! As you can probably tell, I'm pretty good with people.

Here's a picture I don't really give a shit about, but since the entire world hangs on the balance that is Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson, I suppose I'm obligated to tell you about it. It's confirmed: here he is with Vanessa Minillo, some chick I've never heard of, vacationing together in Mexico. They probably "did it." In the bottom. Also, Vanessa Minillo is a whore. She was seen a week later at a Yankees game, watching "boyfriend" Derek Jeter.

So, in conclusion, Nick Lachey likes stupid girls and whores. And nobody really cares. And 98 Degrees was gay.

1 Comments:

Blogger oshkoshb-goshdammgosh said...

sweetcheeks, you're funny. I love you. Let's make babies, or at least find a way for two women to make babies that doesn't involve David Crosby.

10:05 AM  

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