Friday, August 11, 2006


Early Tuesday morning, Paris Hilton's pet kinkajou, Baby Luv, bit her on the arm.

The bite barely broke the skin and only required a tetanus shot. Unfortunately, Baby Luv was not wearing a "dental dam," so her fur will probably fall out and she probably contracted herpes.



Anonymous easy e said...

Isn't this the second time that thing's bitten her? Where can I buy one of those?

7:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I <3 kinkajous.

8:07 AM  
Anonymous No, I said...

That thing looks ferocious!
Look how it's gnashing it teeth!

Speaking of teeth, does anyone else find it strange that in beginning of "The Munsters" (while the theme song is playing), Lily offers her hand to Grandpa and he promptly turns it over and trie to bite her wrist. He's her father... Wouldn't that be considered vampire incest??? Do vampires have scruples???

I thought I'd just throw that out there!

8:26 AM  
Anonymous ninja's grandma said...

Everyone knows vampires don't have scruples. Hence the lack of a soul.

8:32 AM  
Anonymous jrzbigsmellytwat said...

Everybody knows Paris Hilton doesn't have a soul. The wonkey eye is a dead give away.

11:52 AM  
Blogger Praz said...

Poor kinkajou, now she has to get a tetanus shot. One more incident like this and they will have to put Paris down.

2:12 PM  
Anonymous meat hat said...

I'm surprised that Baby Luv hasn't contracted herpes earlier. I bet that whore would put a kinkajou in her puss if she thought everyone would think it was sexy.

3:14 PM  
Blogger Showgrrrl said...

As if a Dental Dam is going to save the poor little bastard (no, not Paris, the Baby Luv).
Seriously, I love pets as much as the next sucker, but sometimes you just can't keep half-monkey, half rat/racoon crossbreeds in your sex-toy drawer. Maybe Wonkey-Eye should invest in some gerbils or a small menagerie of vampire bats - you know, fight a little 'fire crotch' (who are we kidding, it should belong to Paris anyway) with fire... er rabies?

7:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Only Paris Hilton would have a kinkajou as a pet along with a f-ing tiger. I bet she has a unicorn too.

7:51 PM  
Anonymous Dragulf said...

Unicorns only have Virgins as friends. We know Paris isn't one.

10:47 PM  
Blogger ladyambar said...

Oh, poor that little itty bitty thing! To bite that nasty skanky old dry bone! Someone feed this little critter. The pet doesn't want to be deprived of food like you Paris...

12:21 AM  

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