SPANK CHEEKS

Thursday, August 31, 2006

IT'S NOT GAY IF YOU DON'T USE TONGUE

I thought pledging yourself to Xenu was supposed to cure you of "the gay." Maybe this is one of those "brotherly love holy kisses" actually commissioned by Scientology. Like the "brotherly love holy touching and rubbing penises," or the "brotherly love holy anal exploration." Both very comfortable and very non-gay ways of greeting another man.

Dragulf spanks it better than anyone. Thanks for the tip!

Source

47 Comments:

Anonymous easy e said...

Now the lead role in Hairspray makes perfect sense!

6:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

WTF?!?!?!?

7:22 AM  
Blogger sonya said...

It's a good thing that I haven't eaten yet.

7:53 AM  
Blogger Walrus Gumboot said...

Sonya, you look remarkable like the Corpse Bride.

She's hot!


Upon further inspection of the 'Revolta Travolta' pic, that thing he's kissing is Kelly Preston, sans makeup, wig and the other accoutrements that make a woman, a woman.

Look at the hands. The hands always give it away.

8:08 AM  
Anonymous GEMBLE said...

YOU KNOW HOW I KNOW HE'S GAY? HE'S KISSING A MAN THAT'S HOW.

8:30 AM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

JTLTC

8:34 AM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

Gemble, sweetie, typing in all caps is rude. And since we are all good christian folk around these parts, maybe it's time to stop with the caps.

Cuz the last thing we need around here is rudeness...

Swearing, sexual innuendos, celeb bashing, occasional racism and fun ways to use the word cunt, yes... Rudeness, no....

Love with all my pink taco,
ladyjane
aka
krisdylee

8:39 AM  
Blogger Walrus Gumboot said...

ladyjane- I don't agree with 'occasional racism'.
We need, love, crave, racism all the time.

8:47 AM  
Anonymous My Well Rehearsed Mistake said...

What is up with these Scientology fruitloops? The men turn the women into zombie housewives and then all secretly get together to 'worship Xenu', but really they just have a gayfest gangbang. Come on fellas if you're gonna do it you should at least come out of the closet... look at Tom Cruise, he "couldn't be happier", Oh no, wait... that's Jessica Simpson

8:51 AM  
Anonymous xxx said...

This will be hard to explain to the wifey! "No, honey, he was getting a crumb off of my lip, that's all."

8:54 AM  
Anonymous xxx said...

He looks a little tubby, too!

9:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We shoulda seen the signs in Grease and Saturday Night Fever... we shoulda seen the signs... damn placenta eaters!!!

9:17 AM  
Blogger smellypiratehooker said...

Yeah, sure, Scientology is for all the normal actors in Hollywood.

9:33 AM  
Blogger Anastasia Beaverhausen said...

Is it a pre-requisite of Scientology to have homosexual tendencies?

9:43 AM  
Blogger biatcho said...

If I had to come home to a waste of a crotch like Kelly Preston everyday I'm pretty sure I'd fuck anything else that moved other than her, including, but not limited to, ligers, wildebeasts and Corey Feldman.

9:46 AM  
Blogger smellypiratehooker said...

I wonder what xenutastic sacrament "deep throating another man" is.

10:24 AM  
Anonymous Stallion said...

Where's Mister White Secure American, he could cure them of The Gay or atleast he could jerk off in their Libtard salad......

10:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So you hate blacks, Arabs and gays. And you pretned your not racist!

10:55 AM  
Anonymous tp21 said...

I'm curious to see how his agent's going to clean up this man-mess! And they say any press is good press, unless you've got your lips 'pressed' to another man's mouth!

10:58 AM  
Blogger ApacheRose said...

Anonymous, seriously, fuck off. We are NOT racist. We fucking hate EVERYBODY, including you.

Don't believe it? Check out a Lohan or Parasite thread.

11:05 AM  
Anonymous tp21 said...

God forbid you mention someone's ethnicity or sexual preference. I swear it's like we're in some George Orwellian nightmare.

Anonymous*** Fuck off and get off the computer! I'm sure there are some people who need to work on their physics paper. It's not nice to hog the computer lab.

11:16 AM  
Blogger biatcho said...

goddamnit... i left the confines of the superficial thinking everyone on here would be cool and not a douchesolution. Apparently there's an infestation... this anonymous person is a black muslim faggot.

11:18 AM  
Anonymous anonymousownsyou said...

I don't need to check out a thread, I know I like big black cock in my asshole, no thread will tell me any different.

11:18 AM  
Blogger biatcho said...

why are you against muslim cock in your asshole? racist!

11:19 AM  
Anonymous TrannyGranny said...

Travolta is grabbing that rail and thinking "damn, that's a huge cock, come home soon butt-buddy, I need my "septic tank" pumped!"

11:38 AM  
Blogger twzzlrgirl said...

Septic tank pumped -- best line I've heard all day.

Maybe there is something in scientology writing that makes you gay? Like hypnosis or something?

JTLTCC (John Travolta loves Tom Cruise's cock).

11:43 AM  
Anonymous Dragulf said...

So, is Homoism a word?

Travolta was gay before he went all scientologisty. They 'cured' him or so they say.

BTW his wife was with him on that plane trip so she knows about the trips he takes round the 'septic tanks.'

No Libtard salad posts? I thought the anonymous troll was him.

12:58 PM  
Blogger Anastasia Beaverhausen said...

Well, I for one am not racist (nor is my pussy, btw). I love everyone, including niggers, spics, micks, guineas, jews, gooks, sand niggers, crackers, half breeds, fags, dykes, trannies, etc.,etc...

1:19 PM  
Anonymous jrzmommymustdie said...

Ms. Beaverhausen,

I think I love you.

Your nigger-,Jew, mick-, spic-, sand-nigger-, guinea-, gook-, wop-, chink-hating racist friend in christ,

Tim

1:28 PM  
Anonymous spatz said...

Racist stereotype much? Where do I sign on?

2:16 PM  
Blogger chillytatas said...

Ana, you are so accomodating, we love ya!

2:25 PM  
Blogger cock-ninja said...

I'll be right back I forgot my tube of anal-eze.

2:53 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

A. B.-
you forgot "jungle bunnies"!

5:17 PM  
Blogger biatcho said...

my all time fvorite is:

wall-biting, nine-iron wedgehead (you know, orientals).

5:38 PM  
Blogger Anastasia Beaverhausen said...

LOL, evil buns, my apologies.

5:38 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

da nada.

and ninj, if you're not going to get the bunny references, quit bitching at me!

hopping as fast as i can, dude!

buns

6:57 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

crap. i always forget to post on topic.

there is something SO wrong with this picture. as stallion would say, i can't put my finger in it.

then again, maybe there's nothing wrong, and i'm just disgusted. i would REALLY love to hear his explanation on this. i don't care, i just can't wait for the titallating ( i can't spell it, but i do love that word!) story.

7:02 PM  
Blogger Anastasia Beaverhausen said...

Buns, I certainly hope the picture disgusts you because he is a Scientologist and not because he is a rod rider. Because that would just be prejudice.

Hehe, rod rider...

7:32 PM  
Blogger smellypiratehooker said...

Butt-PIRATE!

8:26 PM  
Anonymous THEREARETHOSEWHOCALLMETIM said...

That guy is just fug.

8:27 PM  
Anonymous morningglory said...

Poor Kelly! I hope this isn't how she found out her hubby was a tush-plower!

9:30 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

A.E.
so many things....
btw, i didn't welcome you here!

honestly, the scientolgy disgusts me more.
of course y'all know elron was extremely homophobic?

among other things!

9:38 PM  
Blogger biatcho said...

funny that l ron was homophobic considering that scientology is nothing but speed dating for gays.

9:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

myspace image

10:00 PM  
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1:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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2:07 PM  
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11:31 PM  

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