SPANK CHEEKS

Thursday, August 24, 2006

SPANK IT YOURSELF 8.24.06


Heather Locklear's skirt has no secrets. (I'm Not Obsessed)

Andy Roddick forgets to zip his pants. (Queerty)

Kevin Federline is so cool, he smokes cigarettes underwater. (Pink is the New Blog)

Cindy Crawford sells her soul to the plastic devil. (Faded Youth)

Ever wish you could hold a gun to an American Idol contestant's head? Somebody actually did. (Best Week Ever)

Brad and Angie take in a photo exhibit. I'm guessing pictures of the perverse sexual rituals of cannabilistic African tribes. Or maybe kittens hanging from tree limbs. (x17)

Brandon Davis is hocking the family jewels. Now, if he would just cut off his own. (NY Daily News)

23 Comments:

Anonymous Stallion said...

Those are some "cheek's" that need spanking..........

12:42 PM  
Anonymous tp21 said...

I've got those cheeks right HERE, big boy!!

12:44 PM  
Anonymous stallion said...

I can't, you made my meds taste all salty and shit..........

12:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like this MILFy looking beeotch. David Spade must be saying his prayers right now.

1:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love that bow-legged, I'd crazy glue my face right there, right below the arch.

1:09 PM  
Blogger Walrus Gumboot said...

I'll guarantee that pussy is still tight as a 12 year olds, even after Tommy Lees elephant dork.


I'd hit that with MY cock-ninja!!!

1:48 PM  
Blogger Walrus Gumboot said...

Did anyone else notice that "comments" mysteriously turned into "spankings" overnight?

It's a fresh, unique and some serious B&Dism.



I love MY spankings!

2:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I noticed that this morning too! Cute!

3:38 PM  
Blogger Anastasia Beaverhausen said...

What rolls down stairs?
Alone or in pairs?
And, makes a buzz-ity sound?
It's long - a schlong - a marvelous dong!
Everyone knows - it's dildo!

What fits in a sock?
Feels better than cock?
And, unlike a man, it's slow
It vibrates a bit
Feels great on your clit
Everyone knows - it's dildo!

It's Dildo! It's Dildo!
It's big - it's fleshy - it's ribbed
It's Dildo! It's Dildo!
Yes, that's right, it's ribbed

What fits in your crack?
Some even have sac's?
The penis you don't have to blow
They're not just for gays
They use double-a's (AA's)
Everyone knows - it's dildo!

A dildo-dog. A dildo-plane.
Many more vibrating toys
You turn the knob - they buzz and throb
Feels great in girls and boys!

What makes you cum?
And, fits in your bum?
Some of them even can glow!
A dink! A dink! In marvelous pink!
Everyone knows - it's dildo!

A long fleshy tube
Use oil-based lube
Not just for the neighbourhood ho's
For a Girl on the go
With no time for a beau
It makes for the perfect fellow

They're dildoes! They're dildoes!
The sex toys that everyone likes!
They're dildoes! They're dildoes!
For gay men and even for dykes!

4:21 PM  
Blogger chillytatas said...

My precious sticky buns,
I've been so busy with the outside world that I forgot what was really important, how could I neglect my fellow granny/spankers??
Hey buns, I want your email too! Sonya could probably email it to me if you want.
Oh and you all are invited over next summer, party at my place.

I wrote the above on an earlier post, but just in case you missed it Buns, here it is again.

4:34 PM  
Blogger Walrus Gumboot said...

Hey Beaverhouse- That's the old "Slinky" song!
Very catchy.

4:37 PM  
Anonymous Zanna said...

I'm weepy after readying The Beav's remake of the slinky. Thank GOD they make Lithium AA's now. Last 7x longer, dontcha know!

4:48 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

I feel the need to spank, but, gosh-darn it, I'm not in a cunty mood today. I am, however, horny as hell, and all that singing of dildos makes me wanna hump the washing machine when it's on the spin cycle.

6:00 PM  
Anonymous TrannyGrannt said...

I always wanted to stick it up a woman's ass while she was humping the washing machine. True story.

6:02 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

Hey Tranny...

Well, now. I think I just came a little....

True Story.

6:09 PM  
Blogger cock-ninja said...

What walks down stairs?
Alone or in pairs?
And makes a clittity sound
It's meat, It's beef
It tastes like chicken.
It's loose... it's tight.
You can beat it all night.
Everyone knows it CUNTO!



O.k. slightly different iambic pentameter but you get the idea.


ninj

6:09 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

I can ejaculate.

6:13 PM  
Blogger Anastasia Beaverhausen said...

GOD DAMN! Those McFlapps look tasty Tranny! Shit...does that make me a lesbian?

6:48 PM  
Blogger twzzlrgirl said...

o.k., Ninj...first talk about canterbury tales, and now iambic pentameter -- just getting me all hot and wet and bothered.

English lit turns me on...

8:56 PM  
Blogger twzzlrgirl said...

Oh, and Ladyjane, I, too, can ejaculate.

We should form a club! Looking for good names (thinking, thinking)...

8:57 PM  
Blogger Walrus Gumboot said...

"The Ejaculadies"

9:37 PM  
Blogger chillytatas said...

"Fountains of Jane"

9:49 PM  
Anonymous Dragulf said...

"The Fountains"

"Look out below!"

"Happy Trails"

"Anyday Now"

"Welcome to the Ejaculatorium" <-- Not my word

"Fireworks Extravaganza"

I give up, not in a funny mood tonight...

1:04 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home