SPANK CHEEKS

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

SPANK IT YOURSELF

Yes, Virginia, men can get "camel toes." (DListed)

How do you tell the real Paris from the fake one? The wonky eye and the smell. (MollyGood)

Kate Moss can't resist Pete Doherty's luminous smile. (Perez Hilton)

Water, lettuce and cigarettes -- Kate Bosworth enjoys a three-course meal. (IDLYITW)

20 Comments:

Anonymous easy e said...

Yeah, it's confirmed, Jake is a gay. How else could he have a camel toe like that unless he's secretly got a vagina? Or teeny-weeny balls? Either way, gay gay gya.

2:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A wedge of lettuce? What a fucking PIG!! No wonder shes so goddamn fat!

3:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Really. She probably overdid it with the water, too. She she run six miles and then make herself vomit.

5:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Because she is a fucking lardass, I mean.

5:04 PM  
Anonymous walrus gumboot said...

Hopeless_ where are you? It's me Suicidal! Thanks for the invite! Where do I stand, it's crowded in here! I forgot the "Zinf", but I hope this bag of Ganja will suffice?

5:32 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

hmmm...wha'?
ganja? munchies? i dunno about that. tequila has no carbs...................

oh, man! i just had a multiple ellipsis! i thought that was only a legend!

6:20 PM  
Blogger cock-ninja said...

Walrus. chill. I'm here, and there and here and there and everywhere. Need to get 'twzzlrgrl' over here too, she's a teacher /slash/ polygamist or a polygamist /slash/ teacher, it doesn't really matter, she can teach me whatever she wants. Help me out with that if you see her around.

Another cool sight is:

http://trannyandzannagranny.blogspot.com

(I think I got that right)

EvilBunny: ..............mmmmm...
show me the way of multiple.......
...................................
eeeeeeee lip siiiiiiiiiiis........


ninj

7:04 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

I've said it before, I'll say it again:

Gay-schmay... Jake is a hot piece of meat, and I would hold him down and fuck the brains right out of him. No questions asked.

8:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whereas one who was gay would "fuck the shit" out of him, no?

8:35 PM  
Blogger Showgrrrl said...

WEEELLLLL Looky here! I go away for 5 days, and come back to THIS - my BELOVED CHEEKS is once again brightening my day with her dirty whorish mouth! And I love it. And I've missed it so much! :D
As far as tiny balls goes(easy e!)... the balls have to be nice and large. Tiny balls, (or "long balls" as I like to call them eg. too much ball sack) = nasty. A guy might as well just have a tiny penis, if he's got the longnuts going on. See, long balls translates into another thing I call 'Bat Wings' if the temperature gets too hot... I'm sure we all get the picture.
Yes, I have spent a crazy amount of time pondering these things... why!? I don't even have to DEAL with them anymore... but still. Maybe I just like to laugh about other people's (read: Jakey's) misfortunes. Meh. We all know I'm going to hell anyway...

8:42 PM  
Blogger Showgrrrl said...

WEEELLLLL Looky here! I go away for 5 days, and come back to THIS - my BELOVED CHEEKS is once again brightening my day with her dirty whorish mouth! And I love it. And I've missed it so much! :D
As far as tiny balls goes(easy e!)... the balls have to be nice and large. Tiny balls, (or "long balls" as I like to call them eg. too much ball sack) = nasty. A guy might as well just have a tiny penis, if he's got the longnuts going on. See, long balls translates into another thing I call 'Bat Wings' if the temperature gets too hot... I'm sure we all get the picture.
Yes, I have spent a crazy amount of time pondering these things... why!? I don't even have to DEAL with them anymore... but still. Maybe I just like to laugh about other people's (read: Jakey's) misfortunes. Meh. We all know I'm going to hell anyway...

8:42 PM  
Blogger Showgrrrl said...

OOPS! Gaddamn margaritas on a Tuesday... welcome to Canada! hahahahaha

8:43 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

Showgrrrl, you Canadian cunt... I'm a BC grrrl too.

I think I love you.

8:50 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

Oh, and I'll see you in hell too.

8:50 PM  
Blogger Showgrrrl said...

Sha-Fuckin'- ZAM! I KNEW I shoulda been hangin' out in that closet with the rest of you bitches for the last 3 weeks! ROWR!
BC grrrls rock ;)

9:00 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

showgrrrl: I am a decade older than you. Come, my sweet, and suckle at my wizened teat of knowledge. So that I may nourish you in cuntastic evil.

10:31 PM  
Blogger chillytatas said...

I love Jake, oh how I love him, cameltoe and all. I don't care, I'll abuse all of his orifices with all of my lady appliances. Oh God, I shouldn't be this excited with nobody to help me out, hubby is being an ass and is asleep.
Showgrrrl, who are you on the SF? And I hate to be ignorant but ladyjane, are you krisdylee? I'm slow, eh?

11:15 PM  
Blogger Showgrrrl said...

Janey - Hell yes, I'll suckle at yer teat of knowledge ANY day! Cuntastic evil has been beckoning me, and I haven't seemed to be able to find THE perfect outlet for it. Maybe we can swap dildo stories and pleasure each other with titillating stories of wonkey-eye's meat curtains.
Which leads me to my next response...
ChillyTatas! HI!!! Actually, I'm Showgrrrl on the SF too, but I can't even recall the last time I had a comment on there... it's been too depressing lately. Cheeks' blog is WAY more better! ;) And evidently I get to learn the mystical ways of CUNTASTIC EVIL, so there ya go...

11:55 PM  
Anonymous walrus gumboot said...

spankcheeks - Call me an ignorant asswipe, but how do I get my username that cool blue color???

12:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

gumboot-
you are an ignorant asswipe. you have to click "other" and put your website in to make your name blue and a link.

7:46 AM  

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