SPANK CHEEKS

Friday, September 01, 2006

SPANK IT YOURSELF 9.01.06


Jessica Alba walks her dog. Fuck you, there's no news today. (Yeeeah!)

Jessica Simpson wins a free car. Once again, God gives me the finger. (NY Daily News)

Can you guess what the inside of Pete Doherty's apartment looks like? I'll give you a hint, start with 'syringes.' (Dlisted)

Brad Pitt goes to New Orleans to help people. And maybe see some boobies. (A Socialite's Life)

Johnny Depp is the nicest fuckin' pirate you'll ever meet. (IDLYITW)

Mos Def gets beat down by the boys in blue. (Seriously? OMG! WTF?)

23 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Johnny Depp makes me feel like a 14 year old schoolgirl, what a man!

12:26 PM  
Blogger smellypiratehooker said...

Johnny makes me feel like a 14 yr old girl, and I AM a man!

12:29 PM  
Blogger smellypiratehooker said...

That was a joke. I'm not John Revolta.

12:31 PM  
Blogger ApacheRose said...

I adore Johnny Depp. So. very. yummy. He just gets better every year, too.

Mmmm.. pirates.

12:46 PM  
Blogger spankcheeks said...

Pirates: they're so hot right now.

1:06 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

Arrggh, matey, whilst he be whippin' out his jolly roger, I'll be walking the plank on the port side.

Hot, huh?

1:14 PM  
Blogger biatcho said...

i want to be on him.

1:29 PM  
Blogger biatcho said...

in the biblical sex through a sheet sort of way.

1:29 PM  
Blogger Anastasia Beaverhausen said...

Johnny Depp isn't that accomodating, its all a show for the cameras. How do I know this? Well, he didn't seem all that pleased with me sitting across from him at the park and masturbating. And he repeatedly refused my request to give him a blowjob.

Is that how you treat your fans Johnny?!

2:09 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

PLEASE TELL ME THEY'RE STILL FILMING IN PALMDALE!!!!

okay, i'm gonna post this AGAIN

sept. 19 is "talk like a pirate day"

http://talklikeapirate.com/piratehome.html

2:30 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

oh, yeah. the brad pitt thing.
i have friends all along the gulf coast (yes, ninj, i'm going to WHINE), and there are so many bleeding places that need help. sure, NOLA got hit, but they've gotten the most attention, and the damage was not any worse than anyplace else. an i love that city. it's seen my boobies more than any of you will! :)!
i got the beads to prove it!!

sorry, got distracted. this idiot needs to figure out that the folks along the coast don't need ARCHITECTURE. they need homes. they need the basics.

i really fucking hate this guy.

*crawling under the bed to avoid the verbal abuse*
*waving white flag*

okay, i'm done.
this time i'm signing as


evil

2:38 PM  
Blogger cock-ninja said...

EVIL

Wow, how does one respond to that array of inconsequential babble?; way to go miss Thread-Murderer!!!

I can see that the hysterectomy has done nothing to change your hysterical ways.

Welcome back
Missed ya

Yours truly,

ninj

3:38 PM  
Blogger cock-ninja said...

It's a love/hate thing.

3:40 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

my beloved ninj:
bite me.


i saw some comic on an old HBO concert who said that everything that plagues women the most (huh?) had men involved. i set that up badly, but it still works:
MEN-struation
HIS (sic) terectomy
MEN-opause.

p.s.
i learned from the king of inconsequential babble.

heh-heh.

yeah, love you too

4:08 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

ninj-
read your email, asshat.

4:21 PM  
Anonymous Dr. rokter said...

Hysteria: The root 'hyster'-- comes from the Greek word for womb. So, the psychological disturbance termed 'hysteria' was originally believed to be a disease of women and resulted from some disturbance in the uterus. It's origin is in the late 17th century.

Similarly, a hysterectomy first appearing in English in the mid-19th century, is the removal of the womb, or uterus.

5:01 PM  
Blogger LadyJane said...

dr. fucking rokter, you found us!!!

C'mon over here, I need you to feel something and tell me if it's engorged or swollen.

5:03 PM  
Anonymous tp21 said...

I thought dr. rokter was dead!

5:40 PM  
Anonymous tp21 said...

You found the cheeks! Good on ya, doctor.

5:41 PM  
Blogger chillytatas said...

Alright, the doctor is in!

8:06 PM  
Anonymous evil bunny said...

boobies.

just seeing if anybody is still awake!

:)

11:10 PM  
Blogger Walrus Gumboot said...

bunny, I'm awake but you won't want to talk to me.
I yawn and scratch my crotch alot. Plus I spit Skoal into an old Pabst Blue Ribbon beer can. I've also got a fungus under two toes on my right foot.

I'm in pretty bad shape

But my cock... my cock functions properly, when I can keep it in my Sansabelts.


I would like to meet you in your bunny hutch for a little 'Thumper' action.

1:40 AM  
Anonymous TrannyGranny said...

I've said it before, and I will say it again now. I don't know if I could ever have sex with Jessica Alba, cause I don't know if I could pry my face off her pussy.

30 degrees and drizzly in the "Taint" hope everyone elses weekend is a bit more out-doors friendly.

9:48 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home