KATIE BUYS "SPECIAL" LINGERIE
Katie Holmes spent a lot of money on special lingerie for her big day. MSNBC reports:
Tom Cruise’s bride-to-be went to Le Bra Lingerie in West Hollywood and spent more than $3,000 on lacy underthings, more than $1,000 of which was for a “bridal collection” set.Okay, you are going to Italy for your wedding. A country well renowed for the best couture fashion has to offer, and you buy your shit in West Hollywood?? As you know, these are the opportunities that I watch for so that I can read blithely between the lines. And when I read between these lines, I discern that this “bridal collection” was an elaborate ruse to camouflage the fact that she's really buying strap-ons, butt plugs, astro-glide, a jewel-encrusted wrestler’s outfit and an L.Ron Hubbard mask. Because that there is how Tom Cruise likes to get his consummation on.
Among the purchases: a Chantilly lace bridal collection, reports a source. Among the goodies: a bra that cost $440, a $340 thong, a garter belt for $220, and silk stockings that went for $95 — for a total of $1,190.
Additionally, Holmes picked out a silk nightgown with a matching robe trimmed with ostrich feathers that set her back $620, a lace bra with Swarovski crystals for $380 and matching thong with crystals for $175, as well as two sets of silk pajamas and matching robes at $425 each.
Okay. You’re going to one of the most beautiful countries with the best couture in the world, and you buy your shit in West Hollywood (which is notoriously known for gay bars, etc).
Get it? Because he’s a homo-erectus. And by that I mean he has a smallish brain, low forehead, and protruding face. He's also gay.