SPANK CHEEKS

Friday, November 03, 2006

LINDSAY LOHAN LIES


Lindsay Lohan is in some kind of fucked up space/time continuum because she was out-of-her-tree fucked up the other day. And suddenly she’s “90 days sober”.

First of all, that is NOT what a 90 day AA coin looks like. Well, I’ve never made it 90 days - hell, I've never been to AA. But I've seen them and they look like a real coin. Not a plastic piece of shit that you hang off yourself because you’re being ANONYMOUS about it. They look like this.

And I’m thinking since this chic can’t take a dump without the paparazzi being there; we’d DEFINITELY know if she’s been going to AA meetings. They are there to traumatize us with pictures of her firecrotch, or follow her around while she’s shitfaced and paranoid but somehow they missed her going to the basement of some random church to read passages from the “Big Book”.

I’m watching you, Lindsay. I know a faker when I see one. I’m the kind of person who sticks her thumb in her mother’s ashtray and stamps her own forehead on Ash Wednesday just so it looks like I went to Church.

source

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

As a sober member of AA I can say that the chip she is wearing is what is given out in meetings when you aquire 90 days of sobriety. I have several that I got from the various different meeting I attend. It is also true that metal chips are given out, but usually represent "years" of sobtiety.

12:48 PM  

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