SCARLETT JOHANSSON TO PLAY JENNA JAMESON?

I hope this movie goes direct to video because a “life story” of Jenna Jameson isn’t going to be worth watching unless it actually is a porn, and my days of getting off inside the movie theatre are over.

I lied. No, they’re not. PR Inside reports:

The stunning actress has been handpicked by adult movie legend Jenna as her personal choice for the lead in a film adaptation of her book, 'How to Make Love Like a Porn Star: A Cautionary Tale'.

Jenna is currently in talks with producers and hopes filming will begin next year.

The X-rated actress told Britain's FHM magazine: "We're looking hopefully at Scarlett Johansson. She's my choice. I think she's beautiful." Scarlett has already vowed to strip off for the cameras if the right role comes along, saying last year: "I'm not opposed to doing nudity - it would just have to be the right project." There's certainly been plenty of nudity in Jenna's life - the racy star has appeared in around 100 porn films and is one of the highest paid adult actors in the world.

She may be ten years younger than 32-year-old Jenna, but sultry Scarlett, 22, already shares the porn queen's sex symbol status.

'The Black Dahlia' star, who is famed for her curvy figure, was voted Sexiest Woman Alive by readers of American men's magazine Esquire last year.

Both actresses also have trademark blonde hair and are renowned for their glamorous image.

Oh yes. A Cautionary Tale. I was going to make a “Jenna’s Tail” joke but I lost it when my mind wandered more toward anal bleaching, double penentration, and knowing how to position yourself for the money-shot. Then I thought about how Ron “The Hedgehog” Jeremy can blow himself. My ADD can really fuck up a post harder than John Holmes can fuck a….hey look! A butterfly…